Cool Story Bro

So, earlier I posted about the differences between American children and Spanish children; and I must take back one thing... Spanish children do actually complain about random stupid stuff just like American children do.

I have come to learn this very well from my time watching the four and five year olds on patio.  Often times, when a complaint is absurd I'll just say sorry and wait for them to walk away.  Recently, however, I have taken to just saying stuff in English that they obviously won't understand.  Generally I start with "oh my gosh" and I usually go somewhere like "in the grand scheme of things" or "compared to everything else going on in this world."  Its really a shame that the kids don't understand me, because I find it quite humorous.

Really, though, in the moments when a kids is telling me about their petty problems I just want to say,

So here is my compilation of children's complaints:

(Names have been omitted to save the children some pride... they're also translated from Spanish.)

"______ doesn't want to play dogs with me."

"______ did this (flicking motion) to my book bag."

(In tears) "______ wants to play police with me... but I don't want to play."

(In tears) "_____ won't listen to me when I talk to him."

"Teacher, _____ is screaming like a crazy person."

"______ pushed me on accident." (Clearly not hurt)

....And here is a bonus one from this summer that was actually my favorite ever:

"______ called me a cheese burger."

This is my life.

The end.